skies are crying, but something's coming.

Sunday, 29 January 2012

It's this feeling, i can't actually explain. It may sound like im exaggerating or over-thinking, but to me it's real. Tomorrow's gonna be the last day in school with only J2s being in it. And i feel kinda...exposed. And that whole 15Nov2011 feeling just keeps coming back. No, it's not that I don't want to get to know my new batch. As much as i want to be one of them, its obvious im not. It's a matter of getting used to. So orientation's starting this Tuesday, and i have no clue what's going to happen. Justtttt when im getting to know my fellow JC1 senior friends better and getting along with them, this has to happen. We have to be split up again. Get to know new people. I honestly don't know what to expect. The only favour TPJ could do for me right now is to put me into an OG with my friends who are OGLs. That's all i ask for to make my next few days good. So the issue here is just, social acceptance. I dont know where to bury my face if my new batchmates just keep looking down on me. I dont wanna lie, this is my blog and i have the right to say this. Not gonna keep it inside anymore. It kills me inside to know that my friends are all moving forward while im still stuck in this invisible timezone im in. It kills me to think that i can't cope this year as well. It kills me when all my parents do is instruct me to do shit when they know im perfectly capable of doing things in my own time. It kills me to have friends who are really happy in their OGL stuff. Dont get me wrong, i love them as much as i love myself, but there's always gonna be this something at the back of my mind saying i should have been one of them. I know there's always another chance, but it's never the same y'know?

Nevertheless, im honestly really really thankful for the people i have in my life right now, i really can't ask for much more. They're the reason im still living and breathing and trying my best to get over this stupidity i have in myself. I just hope my new friends can accept me for who i am like how the current people in my life have, instead of judging me based on what i have failed in achieving the past year.

I wish that I could fly, way up in the sky, like a bird so high, oh i might just try. I wish that I could fly, way up in the sky, like a bird so high, i think i might just try.


Siti, 17. Im still in progress. If that's clear enough to you. By other means: Tumblr The past is behind us; November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 Bituwin - template Dementee - image	Sunday, 29 January 2012 It's this feeling, i can't actually explain. It may sound like im exaggerating or over-thinking, but to me it's real. Tomorrow's gonna be the last day in school with only J2s being in it. And i feel kinda...exposed. And that whole 15Nov2011 feeling just keeps coming back. No, it's not that I don't want to get to know my new batch. As much as i want to be one of them, its obvious im not. It's a matter of getting used to. So orientation's starting this Tuesday, and i have no clue what's going to happen. Justtttt when im getting to know my fellow JC1 senior friends better and getting along with them, this has to happen. We have to be split up again. Get to know new people. I honestly don't know what to expect. The only favour TPJ could do for me right now is to put me into an OG with my friends who are OGLs. That's all i ask for to make my next few days good. So the issue here is just, social acceptance. I dont know where to bury my face if my new batchmates just keep looking down on me. I dont wanna lie, this is my blog and i have the right to say this. Not gonna keep it inside anymore. It kills me inside to know that my friends are all moving forward while im still stuck in this invisible timezone im in. It kills me to think that i can't cope this year as well. It kills me when all my parents do is instruct me to do shit when they know im perfectly capable of doing things in my own time. It kills me to have friends who are really happy in their OGL stuff. Dont get me wrong, i love them as much as i love myself, but there's always gonna be this something at the back of my mind saying i should have been one of them. I know there's always another chance, but it's never the same y'know? Nevertheless, im honestly really really thankful for the people i have in my life right now, i really can't ask for much more. They're the reason im still living and breathing and trying my best to get over this stupidity i have in myself. I just hope my new friends can accept me for who i am like how the current people in my life have, instead of judging me based on what i have failed in achieving the past year. I wish that I could fly, way up in the sky, like a bird so high, oh i might just try. I wish that I could fly, way up in the sky, like a bird so high, i think i might just try. 21:08 ·